Rifle Falls and the Grand Hogback

Geology and armed waitresses

In my previous post, I spoke of the area between the Grand Mesa and the Colorado River. In this post and the next one, we venture a little way up the Colorado into the place where it has cut through the Rocky Mountains.

The Rockies are the result of an uplift, called the Laramide Orogeny, that happened from about 70 million to about 50 million years ago - spanning the time of the end of the dinosaurs. Once under water or barely level with it, they were forced up by pressure from below when two crustal plates collided where California is now. Then erosion began grinding off the top layers.

What remains in our time is rock that is more than 300 million years old that was formed under the sea: limestone, from the shells of sea creatures that accumulated at the bottom. And now more than two miles above sea level.

Limestone, which is a base, dissolves easily in rainwater, which is slightly acidic after it has percolated through plant material in the soil. So over the eons, groundwater eats limestone - forming caves and other natural features.

Very near to the town of Rifle, Colorado is the western edge of the uplift where the Colorado Plateau ends and the Rocky mountains begin. And uplifts typically have a hogback right outside them where horizontal layers of rock have been bent and tilted upward from the forces below. I have written earlier of the hogback on the other side of the Rockies that is easily seen all along the face of the Rockies from Wyoming to New Mexico.

There is also a hogback, not as easily seen, on the west edge of the Rockies. It’s called the Grand Hogback. It passes very near the town of Rifle. Here is a piece of it:

Tllted layers of the Grand Hogback near Rifle, Colorado.

Note, if you will, the layers that are vertical. They used to be horizontal.

Once you cross this spot going east, you are in the Rocky Mountains - in rock that is much, much older: limestone laid down 300+ million years ago.

Rifle Falls, just a little farther up the same road, is formed from limestone that was dissolved in a stream, then re-deposited as rock called travertine.

Rifle Falls, in the Colorado state park of the same name.

Another view:

Colorado’s Rifle Falls

A lovely place to spend a hot, sweltering day. You can get into the spray…

The town of Rifle is just off Interstate 70, and you go through it on your way up to the falls.

There used to be a restaurant in Rifle, owned by Lauren Boebert who is now a member of Congress, named Shooter’s Grill. It was notorious because every waitress (who was old enough to legally do so) carried a gun on her hip. Yes, the guns were loaded. Yes, each “girl” was trained, practiced, and ready to use her gun.

Wait staff at the Shooter’s Grill in Rifle, Colorado. Phone shots.

The backstory was that there had been an incident, way back when, of someone threatening one or more waitresses when they got off work. So the Boeberts got the women firearms, and training.

I felt very safe there: the only place I’ve ever been willing to sit with my back to the door. Because if anyone had ever tried to barge in yelling “Allahu Akbar,” he would never get to the “Akbar” part. Those ladies could probably shoot faster, and more accurately, than I ever could.

The burgers were pretty good, too.

Phone shot of burger I ate. Note the salt & pepper shakers: shotgun shells.

Sadly, the place is gone now. The building owner declined to renew the lease.